The amateur section on Pornhub is fascinating. Where else could you find a video of some lady riding a dildo while watching Encounter At Farpoint? I’m happy she chose an TNG early episode because I just started watching TNG a few months ago and just reached season 3. If it was any episode after The Ensigns of Command I was gonna have to put my dick back in my pants.
It makes sense somebody would get horny while watching TNG because like most things Star Trek, there’s a noticeable amount of perversion in TNG. I think right after this first meeting with Q, the next episode is The Naked Now, a reboot of the TOS classic The Naked Time where Tasha Yar fucks Data. I wonder if Data’s creators gave him a penis or just attached a massage gun down there. I bet Lore didn’t get the massage gun and that’s his real villain origin story.
Thinking about The Naked Time also reminds me of another TOS episode, This Side of Paradise with the Enterprise going to that planet where flowers are spitting something in everybody’s face that’s making them turn on, tune in and drop out. Spock’s ex is there, she gets him to expose his face to the flower and for the rest of the episode he’s chill as fuck. I wonder how many loads he blew before they set him back to logical, which concludes on that poor soul saying “for the first time in my life… I was happy.”
Don’t Vulcans go mad if they go too long without sex? I think I heard Nick Mullen on Cum Town talking about a Voyager episode where Tuvok rages out because he went 7 years without busting a load and the resolution is sending him to the Holodeck to fuck a hologram lady. Deanna Troi’s mother almost does that in the episode Manhunt. Apparently Betazoid women reach a point later in life when they’re at their horniest. First she tries fucking Picard while the “It’s Happening Again” giant from Twin Peaks watches, then she sets her sights on Riker before finally almost fucking a hologram bartender from Picard’s Dixon Hill program. Weird her super sized Jeeves was never an option. Does he drink so much because he’s not an option or is he too drunk to get a hard on and that’s why she never considers him? I’m not sure.
The very next episode after Manhant is another horny one where they have Worf reconnecting with his old flame, a half Klingon/half human giant goddess. Not only are we getting introduced to the concept of humans and Klingons fucking, but our first example is basically “Lauren Phillips or Alison Tyler, but Klingon.” She’s my kind of gal because I want a lover who can give me a Kevin Nash Jackknife powerbomb.
TNG gave us a sexy Klingon, then Voyager gave us a sexy Borg with Seven of Nine. I haven’t reached that insanity yet but I got a peek at one of her episodes. It’s one where Q introduces Voyager to his son and this kid enters a room where for some unknown reason, Seven of Nine is working in the nude. A Q kid peeking in on a naked Borg like it’s Porkys: The Delta Quadrant, who knew the TNG episode Q Who would eventually lead us here?
Whenever Voyager gets sexual my mind melts in confusion. Things will be calm then all of a sudden it’s “uhhhh Commander Chaktoy got raped by his ex who’s actually a Cardassian and she’s aligned herself with the Kazon and keeping the rape baby.” I like how the Voyager writers immediately regretted that storyline. At first they started saying she “stole Chaktoy’s DNA”, I guess to get viewers imagining something more clinical than rape. Finally the baby’s not revealed to be Chaktoy’s right before killing off Seska. It sucks that character got a death sentence storyline reminiscent of AJ Styles/Claire Lynch in TNA because take away the rape baby and Seska was an interesting foe, certainly more compelling than Cullah. She gave some life to the Kazon who I find inferior to the Vidiian.
I think the most random moment of perversion in Star Trek I’ve seen so far was on Voyager when Captain Janeway and Paris at one point are turned into tadpoleish creatures and have babies before getting turned back. I remember Paris saying something like “sorry about that captain” and Janeway in her purring Katharine Hepburn voice quipping back “perhaps I was the one who initiated it.” I just googled “Janeway and Paris tadpoles” and yes, this happened in the episode Threshold. I just had to confirm this wasn’t a schizophrenic fever dream I had.
Well, I think this has gone on enough. O wait, there’s just one more thing. Speaking of Voyager, would you fuck Tuvix? You’re right, too far.
https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5f7fa22f1e3b8
It's Emilio Amaro's Blog 
“DO THE RIGHT THING, CHAKTOY!”
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
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